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Thursday, September 20th, 2012
2:58 am - Hmmm
Forgot about this place. I haven't written in here in like 2 years. I wonder if there is a way to back it all up and keep it local. That way if my journal is suddenly deleted after not logging in for another 3 or 4 years, I won't lose every little thing I've written. Then again, this was my journal for bitching. Apparently I haven't had anything to bitch about in years. That or Facebook is my main place of stay these days.

Anyone even still here?

current mood: sleepy

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Monday, October 12th, 2009
4:35 pm - Huh... it's been awhile... again...
Hey, look, it's my livejournal.

I've forgotten all about this whole thingy. With all my free time, I should at least be writing about whateverthefuck.

It's a boring Monday with nothing to do. Fun fun fun. Karaoke later. I guess. Maybe I'll drink my problems away. That's always fun.

current mood: blah

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Sunday, January 11th, 2009
4:42 pm - Barak Obama
Alright, Barak Obama is about to become our 44th President of the United States. I voted for him as well as many of you did, I'm sure. So, for shits and giggles, I thought of the whole Bible Code thing. If you don't know what that's all about, do some research.

Pretty much the Bible code, also known as the Torah code, is a cipher alleged to exist within the texts of the Torah, that when decoded form words and phrases demonstrating foreknowledge and prophecy. The study and results from this cipher have been popularized by the book The Bible Code. You can look it up more in depth on wikipedia.

Anyhow, the story is that using a computer and the original text of the Torah, using sequential jump patterns and such, if you search for something, relevant information can pop up through it with pertinant information. Apparently this has all been done with past events successfully.

For testing purposes they've take a large book, like War and Peace, and have tried to do this mathematical sequential jump sequence with that and it hasn't come up with the same results.

Either way, I decided out of boredom to do a search for Barak Obama and Bible Code. This is what I uncovered:


Obama is the Anti-Christ. This is the evidence:

1.- He will come as a man of Peace (Obama promises peace in Iraq, defeat for the US)
2.- He will come mounted on a white Female horse(Obama mother is white who had 6 African husbands)
3.- He will come to deceive( Obama says he's a Christian but in fact he was born a Muslim, practices the Islamic religion, prays Friday’s facing Mecca)
4.- He will make himself the most powerful man on earth, if elected
5.- He will try to destroy the Jewish People and Israel( Obama has said he loves the Arabs specially the Palestinians, hates Israel and Jews. Admires Hitler, Osama etc)
6.- He will present himself as good and righteous but in fact he's Satan himself. Violence is in his heart
7.- Obama will help Al Qaida in its evil projects.
8.- Barack Hussein Obama is the “King of the South” predicted in the Bible.(Daniel .11, Kenya is south of Jerusalem)
9.- Obama comes to implant muslim Sharia Law upon America.

Obama is the Anti-Christ, beware of him.

Watch him and don't let you be deceived by Him.

Supporters of Obama: 1.5 billion Muslims, Oprah, Louis Farrakanh, Jesse Jackson, Al Sharpton and all American Muslims.





How funny is that?
Everything I just looked up real quick is just crazy.
People are crazy.
Barak is not the anti-christ. I mean, come on.

Anyhow, that's that, I suppose.

current mood: chipper

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Monday, October 6th, 2008
10:18 am - Word
Still alive
Still posting private posts

Saying hello

Things are well, for the most part.

I'm just not exciting anymore. I think out of laziness. So I don't blog so much anymore unless something's bothering me and I need to get it out. But usually I'm pretty happy and too busy to be otherwise, I think.

Anyhow... word.

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Tuesday, October 23rd, 2007
4:33 am - First Post in awhile
You know, I haven't written on here in a long time. Only because my life has been awsome and better. But right now I am really drunk and I'm depressed as shit. And it's not even the fact that I'm drunk. But more so the fact that something has been building up. I wish I could really go into it in detail, but I think it would take a lot of writing and explaining. I'm going through a lot right now. Namely working a lot, but in fact, I think working a lot is keeping me busy from the real issues in my life. People I love and have loved, to say the least. These things plague me more than anyone can imagine. Plus my fucked up views on people that I find attractive. I don't know. It's just not realistic, I think. The people who actually like me aren't in my realm of reality and the people I like aren't in their realm of my reality. I don't know. I feel like I need to leave here still, but soberly, I've had no problems with anything. But I talked to Jehovah tonight and maybe I still need to leave. But I'm not an improv kind of guy. I used to be, I suppose. But I'm more into the creation, direction and musician kinda things in my life at this point. I strayed away from improv, even though I think I'm a pretty funny guy. My humor still needs to be developed. I can take things to a certain level though. That's why Jehovah and I always worked well together. He know's how to take it that one step further.

I don't know. I'm stuck having fucked up attractions and wanting realtions with people who don't make sense. And the one's who do are already dead. And even so, that might not make sense either.

All I know is one thing. I've liked people in my past because they are fucking awesome. And some people don't talk to me anymore and some people are dead. And some of those things are still unbelieveable to me. And other of those things are still my fault. I can't help growing up wanting my first love to be my first sexual experience and to have it be that from there on out. I can't help that I was that fucking naive. I am such a different person these days that anyone who knew me so well 10 years ago have no idea now who I am now. And sometimes when I am around them I feel like I have to prove that I've learned something. Even still, I'm shy as fuck and passive aggressive still to a point, but I'm more vocal and better about stuff than I used to be, thanks to Cody. And I am more so emotionally sound. But does that help or change my siutuation? Not really.

So what the fuck am I supposed to do? I am still looking for someone to dress myself like when I was 5 and I'm still pissing the bed like back then, figuratively speaking. Only in much different ways.

I feel like I am entirely fucked. Only I am also drunk. And maybe none of this matters. But deep inside my head, it's still there, no matter how much I pretend that it isn't.


current mood: crushed

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Wednesday, September 27th, 2006
5:03 pm - Evil Tea Bitch + Fire = Homeless
Well... what's new with me, I wonder?

2 Friday nights ago, I was getting home from being out drinking and the tea shop below our apartment was on fire. Lucky us. Jimbo, Seth and Brandon were standing outside as well as D with her snake and Jonathon... both barefoot, because they happened to be sleeping when the smoke was bellowing. I get back and try and call Cody to tell him what's all going on. I'm also really drunk and trying to keep good spirits up, considering.

I check with everyone to see if they are doing alright and talking to my friends. Then after a tiny bit I see Cody there with Josh. Cody is just sorta hanging out with Josh and I walk up to him. The first thing I notice is that there are tears brewing in his eyes and I'm thinking "Uh, ok." The firemen had to break into the porn shop and make sure the fire didn't spread there and to let the smoke bellow out. Somehow the smoked leaked into there as well. So I say to Cody "At least you don't have to wake up early tomorrow to work." In response he says "Not funny" and quickly turns around like a drama queen and walks away. That pretty much killed my good mood.

I bitch him out calling him selfish and how he moved out so he doesn't even give a shit about our apartment or what's going on. He's only giving a shit about his job that he hates and has even jokingly made comments numerous times about burning the place down. He tells me that he does give a shit about the apartment because he "still has stuff up there." What a fucking dick. That was it. I really just wanted to kick his ass. I was sitting there pissed off saying "I want to kick him in the back of the head... just let me do it." After all that I was just a total raving lunatic at him. I always knew he was selfish, but that takes the cake. He didn't go up to D, who was very upset about it all, and ask her if she was ok. He probably wouldn't have even talked to me if I had never came up to him in the first place. He was too busy walking around crying about if he's going to have a job or not.

So now we aren't talking to each other. I realized that night that I just don't need people like him in my life. What a fucking piece of shit. I'm debating whether or not I should just throw all of his stuff onto the curb and leave it there. That would definately be fun to do.

Anyhow, the rumor is that we won't be able to get back into it to live again until sometime next year. They want to use this as an opportunity to really fix everything up, put in alarm systems and sprinkler systems and other stuff. The bathroom needs to be rebuilt, I guess, as well as the septic and water pipes in the whole building. What a mess.

So now I'm at a point where I'm definately not signing a lease and I'm not getting a new apartment here. I will go to NYC and continue my life there. I decided to take a vacation last week after the fire and went from Tuesday to this past Sunday. I had a blast. Won $150 with my best friend doing karaoke, saw Ivanka Trump the first night at a karaoke bar and just ran all around town and had a blast. I already have a couple jobs I could get and I have many places I can crash.

So now I have to sell all my DVDs, pack up what I want to keep and shove them in storage at a friend's place and bail to NYC. I assume I will be going there by the end of October at the latest.

More about everything later. If any of you see Cody around town, call him a faggot and kick him in the junk for me.

current mood: contemplative

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Monday, April 10th, 2006
3:42 am - I'm not that selfish... and god I wish I was
You Are 26% Selfish

In general, you are a very giving person who treats others very well.
But at times, you insist on getting your way - when it matters most to you.

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Tuesday, February 14th, 2006
12:18 pm - Me, as defined by a dictionary...
<td align="center"> Herman Nugent --

A lewd street performer

'How will you be defined in the dictionary?' at QuizGalaxy.com</td>

Yeah... I can see that.

current mood: amused

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Thursday, February 9th, 2006
6:30 am - It's funny...
...how my lyrics still fit into my life today... perhaps that means I haven't learned a damn thing since then. Although written somewhat differently and for a different situation, it still kinda fits.

Forget the fright

Roaming blinded
Forgot all signs

Moving by you
Silent all the time

They can read all about it
My words are safe inside
It's just like me to hide
I'd like to go inside your head

But that's insane

My pen is my shroud

"Tell her, coward.
Do it now, man"

"No way, I'm fine.
No time for it"

Pretending I'm fine

Maybe I'll whine about it
Annoying medication
Why bother fixing things
When I can sort of soar without it

I am retarded

Can't be here
Without a fight
Everything is a struggle

I'm like a bird in flight
Set in a pool of bright light
I can see bottom now
The world inside is blinding white

Forget about it
I'm sad about it
Inside of me lies a coward's mind
Mad about it
Kinda glad about it
If my mind could only flow this way in life

Someday the ride
Will open wide
"Oh, you're fine...
This time"

So, you're alive
Close your eyes
Speak and maintain your pride

Presenting your side
Can you not survive?
It's time to decide

(It's time to decide)
Forget the fright
Did you decide?

Why do I wish that you're mine
Kill me

Well I think about it day and night time
Help me learn to love you for the first time
Can't reach out and hold you at the right time

My feelings
And my time
Have weakened
To trick me into thinking I have a right

Who cares about that?

With this crazy fear
I can't win this fight
With this fight
One day I'll stop
And I'll be real proud
But in the meantime
I can hide

It's just like me to hide
I'd like to go inside your head

But I'm insane

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Monday, February 6th, 2006
5:33 am - My posts
All my posts in here from now on are private.

Nobody needs to know what I'm thinking or how I'm feeling and it changes every hour, so it all doesn't really matter to anybody but myself.

Also, I can talk shit and not have to deal with the reprocussions of such things.

Either way, I now see that it's better to have a huge wall up and not let people get to know you than to let anybody into your life ever. And that's pretty much where I stand from now on.

It's been fun, folks.

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Saturday, January 28th, 2006
3:21 am - Day off
So today was my day off. What did I do on my day off, you might ask yourself? Well, I at least got to sleep in until about 3pm. I got on my computer to find that I had some annoying trojan horse on it. Fucking yay. No time to do anything with it, so I shut it off. So that was the start of a good mood. Then I went up to work, grabbed my paycheck, cashed it. Somehow put way too much more in my bank than I should have had to because for some reason I was -.41, even after putting back in the money I spent last night. It doesn't really make much sense. So I put in another $20, just in case. Although I think I should have, once everything clears, about $30 in there. I hope so. Anyhow, that was obnoxious. I went to the mall, looked around at everything I wanted to have and ate Wendy's. Then I went back home. I spend from around 6pm to almost 1am trying to fix my computer, having everything fail and getting more and more pissed off at it. Earlier I ask Cody if he wants to go shopping, since it's a) friday and I still have money... tomorrow I just might not... and b) I needed to get away from this fucking computer. and c) There's been no food in the house in like 2 weeks. Give or take.

So I call Wilhelm up and we go get groceries. I buy just whatever shit we needed and whatever stuff I wanted to have for my eating pleasure. I get back here, make a pizza, eat that, work on my computer and maintain a pretty pissy self.

Now this piece of shit is fixed, I'm still pissed off... I think it's a combination of my fucking day yesterday and the fact that I spent most of my day off dealing with bullshit and not being able to do stuff like clean around the house and shit, which I usually do on my day off. I really could have used some veggin' out today. But whatever.

I want to fucking break shit right now. Don't know why. It's just how I feel. Or I want to just scream at the top of my lungs and kick holes in the walls. FUCK YEAH! That'd be so much fucking fun right now.

Anyhow, I'm gonna either watch some shit and pass out.

Tomorrow will be better. Although now that I have $20 left to my name, it looks like I've done all my shopping for the week. Fucking christ... I don't know what the hell is going on, but I do know 2 things. First of all, I don't go out drinking as much anymore, and my rent is cheaper. Yet for some fucking reason, I have no money constantly, it feels.

I'm not even buying all that much crap at all. Mostly it seems to all go to eating out and cigarettes. Well, I don't think I'll need to spend much of anything for the rest of the week. Hopefully.

I'm gonna go find a pitch fork now, and jam it into my brain.

Cheers, fuckfaces!

current mood: aggravated

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Friday, January 13th, 2006
10:12 pm - Me

Name / Username:

Name Acronym Generator
From Go-Quiz.com

Happy Friday the 13th. It's January, it's 55, and a full moon. Fuckin' A!

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Wednesday, November 2nd, 2005
5:33 pm - Hmm
Livejournal is different. I haven't written in awhile. Nothing to say, really. I'm at the library using the internet cause it's all I got. I still have no phone. *shrug* It's my day off and I can't think of anything to do. Plus I'm broke.

Things are going very well with the home and ma maayan. I suppose that's it. I'm hungry. I'm gonna go home, make some mac and cheese, and have the shits.

Peace out, my homies. ;)

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Thursday, August 11th, 2005
1:09 am - New Apartment
I obtained my keys today for the new apartment. Tomorrow (Thursday) will consist of going to Ruloff's at 11am for a wine tour in stretch Hummer Limos. Hells yeah! I'm so yelling out the window to everyone we pass. Yes, I'm going to be _THAT_ guy. After that I'll be really drunk and then whatever.

Friday, I shall wake up, work from 11am to 4pm, head downtown and get the moving truck and proceed to collect all of my shit and move it into the apartment. I can't wait!

Then sometime later we shall have a house warming party... and a private dinner for all the people who have helped me with a place to sleep while I was a homeless bastard. :) Ah, so soon it'll all be over.

America, fuck yeah!

current mood: anxious

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Sunday, August 7th, 2005
6:03 pm - Holy tired me
Well, it's been quite a fun last couple of days. Friday night I went to Castaways early for the end of Happy Hour / beginning of 80's night and had a few drinks and hung out with Patti. Then 80's night came into full swing and by the end I was pretty trashed. People were standing around talking about some after hours party and Hank and I left to try and find it. We stumble upon this grad student party or something. Just as we cracked open beers, this one guy is asking us who we were and who we knew there. I saw my friend Jeff there so I was like "Uh, I know Jeff... and Hank..." and he says he doesn't know any of those people and nervously asks us to leave. We took our beers with us and jetted. Seconds later, Jeff comes out and he had just gotten kicked out as well. I suppose my mohawk made me stand out... god forbid a cornell grad student would ever even THINK of sporting a mohawk on one's head. I ended up going to some other party with Jeff and Hank took off. That party was winding down, but I did manage to eat some yummy chex mix stuff. I get back downtown and crash at Patti's.

Saturday I woke up and go out on the boat with Jay. We sat in the middle of the lake and I did some sun bathing / sleeping. We're out there for a couple hours and then I head to Patti's and realize my legs are mega sun burned. We go to karaoke up at Common Ground, eat food, have some drinks and do a little singing. Next month I'll be hosting it again. It's sweet, cause I get paid $50 for 3 hours of fun, free food, and free drinks all night long. :) However, that's september 3rd, so maybe i should reschedule so I can go to the DraculaBall or whatever the hell that is that Wilhelm is spinning for, in Philly, that night. Too much shit going on that day. There's also MuseFest that weekend. But that's probably not going to be all that great. Especially since none of my friend's bands are playing this year.

Anyhow, I get up to work after karaoke and do the door thing and my legs are burning and it's chilly out and I feel like I'm sick because of the contrast of being cold and hot at the same time. Fun fun stuff. I finally get out of work at 2am and head to Old school for any remanance of the party. Mikel and I get there and Mattastic, Abram, Mark, Jesse Fern, and a couple other people are there and we hang out for a bit. Mattastic and I had a battle on the trampoline(sp?) and I did some flips and things... yay. Jenna was there and reminds me of her party tomorrow, but I don't think I'll be able to make it. Plus, it's karaoke... which is sorta my weekly thing I need to do to get out all my demons, so to speak.

Back to the party at Old School, It's getting to be later and later, so Mikel and I go to drive home. She's really wasted and I only had like 4 beers, so I wasn't nearly as gone as she was. She was seeing double and swerving a lot, so I had to steer for her at first, and then decided that wasn't going to work out much, so we switched and I drove stick for the first time in like 10 years. I didn't do too bad. She had to refresh my memory, but I got it down pretty quickly and only grinded a gear once and only stalled out twice. The first time being at a stop sign or something, and the 2nd time with trying to get up her inclined driveway in a low gear and shifting up, when i should have just left it alone. Ah well. I shall do that a tad bit more often, cause I need to get that shit down. Not to mention fun as hell.

We get to her house safe and sound and we have another beer and shoot the shit. I played with her ferrets a tad bit and then she decides she doesn't have time to sleep cause she has to be to work by 8am and it's already 7 or something. So she leaves, I slept for 3 hours, worked at 11am and got out around 4:30ish.

I love my life... sunburns and all.

Me sleepy now *thunk*

current mood: exhausted

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Saturday, July 23rd, 2005
2:21 pm - YAY!
I signed the lease today with my boyfriend and my good friend Kate. We get to move in by August 12th, if not sooner and then everything shall be bad ass! For those who don't know, the apartment is right next door to the porn shop, so you know... lots of back-boothing it for me! ;)

Castaways was fun last night. Got really drunk, made name tags for everyone so that we all fit in more with the class of '85 reunion. After that, a few of us went to First Dam and went skinny dipping and such. The water felt really nice and the falls were heavy... it was a heavy flow at First Dam.

After that ate some Shortstop and passed out. It's been a great week so far... aside from working. Ugh. I swear I work every damn day... and will for like the next 2 weeks. :-/ At least I don't have to be in until the PM tonight.

Anyhow, I'm off to see my man work his stuff at the Palace... peace

current mood: chipper

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Sunday, July 10th, 2005
5:43 am - I didn't want to have something you didn't mean to say
I'm sitting here on the computer after a fun little pajama party that barely anyone showed up to. I would like to thank Becky, Steve, Joe, Jim, Patty, Matt Plastic, and whoever else I've forgotten for at least showing up. I was wanting to see an old friend tonight, but that didn't happen. Instead I got really drunk, pretty stoned, and drank some mushroom tea for a night of fun. Jay's boat is almost ready and we hung out on it tonight and had some fun... it's great! I can't wait for it to be on the water.

Life lately has been awesome... I have a new job, a kick ass significant other, and a new apartment soon. Everything seems to be finally falling into place and I'm enjoying everything. Money is tight, but doable, but that's how it goes, I guess. I'm moving into the new apt. about the 2nd week in august or so, and I'm saving up for deposit and first month... hopefully I can get some sorta deal out of that. In the meantime, I have to crash around for another month. Come July 15th, I will be out of my apt. for a whole month. We shall see how this all works out.

Anyhow, once the new place is functionable, I plan on having nights of drinking mixed with either poker or board game fun. I just want to hang out and not be a party house but a fun gaming / drunken gathering low-key friend kinda hangout. I dunno. I can't wait.

Anyhow... I must crash soon and recover from my day of craziness. Lalala la.

Also, apparently I'm creepy and weird, according to Jonah's mom. Weird, sure. Creepy?... ok, whatever.

I'm about as creepy as a turd in a toilet.

current mood: tired

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Tuesday, June 28th, 2005
11:51 pm - Wheee
So geez, it's been awhile since I last wrote anything. I don't even know where to start. To make it as short and as sweet as possible, I broke up with my boyfriend, got kicked out of my new apartment because of the shit that happened the night before he left. I lost my job the other day because I was stressed out and needing the day off to go and have fun and get away. They wouldn't give it to me off, so I decided to take it off anyhow. Instead of being on a line making burritos, nachos and tacos, I was on rollercoasters and water rides. I think it was a good decision overall, because I just snagged a job at Ruloff's today. :) 2 days of being jobless and I already have another job. Not too shabby. Aside from all of that things are going alright. I'm seeing someone who is awesome and it's finally clicking into place in a good way and that makes me happy. That broken link that's been missing from my life since forever is finally there and it's going extremely well.

Anyhow, I shall write more later at some point once I'm back to being computerized.

current mood: chipper

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Monday, April 18th, 2005
1:50 pm - Yep yep
It's my weekend... woo hoo!!!

(And it's also my birthday)

What to do... what to do...

current mood: curious

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Tuesday, January 18th, 2005
3:14 pm - Yeah... that's about right...

You Are 20 Years Old


Under 12: You are a kid at heart. You still have an optimistic life view - and you look at the world with awe.

13-19: You are a teenager at heart. You question authority and are still trying to find your place in this world.

20-29: You are a twentysomething at heart. You feel excited about what's to come... love, work, and new experiences.

30-39: You are a thirtysomething at heart. You've had a taste of success and true love, but you want more!

40+: You are a mature adult. You've been through most of the ups and downs of life already. Now you get to sit back and relax.

current mood: hungry

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